Square Pegs and Round Holes


May 15, 2017

Car wash aproko

Zee World is very loud on the TV and the proprietress, aka Madame Lolo, is fully engrossed in the love triangle of Gia, Sheika and his mother. They just found out Gia has only one kidney left while trying for IVF. The matter don tough and Madam Lolo is making gestures and moving her body, making the suffering plastic chair creak under her involuntary movements.

A patron is clearly irritated and tries for a spoil by asking for the channel to be changed to “news”.

Madam Lolo swings sharply in rebuke and then quickly softens into a friendly jab.

“Abeg sidan where you dey oga. Wetin? Na one beer and nkwobi wey you buy since morning naim you wan take change channel? Dem never wash your motor finish sef?”
Then she sees I’m quietly observing. I shift my gaze. Too late.
“Ehen, Oga, abi how you see am? Make we change the channel?”
I take one look at the madam and see her pleading/bullying gaze and then face my front and lift my glass up and say, with a deadpan gaze, “any channel is ok by me”.
Madam Lolo gives the patron a friendly victorious smirk. Matter settled.

Patron stares at me in some kind of rebuke.
Wetin concern me. Who patron epp? When Madam Lolo decides to punish me with extra bony goat meat pepper soup later, where will patron be?
Enjoy your work day folks.

Customer dada ni

All the government thieves from all the regions and states of the country helping the solution of Lagos and Ogun states with investments; We want to say thank you as you help our IGR and GDP.

We drive though Osborne, VI, GRA, Lekki, VGC, Nicon town, Cameroon upon Eti-Osa, LFTZ, Agbara and Ikeja industrial and we see the monies from your bankrupted states in action. Even the Rolls Royce and Range Rover Jaguar dealership in Cameroon, that we residents visit only for tourism, cannot keep up with your thirst. Luxury tax lobade! Saa baamu.
We shall continue to do everything to make ourselves the investment destination of choice.
The latest inflow of $3M, from a meningitis ravaged state full of sinners, is also welcome. We don bite our tax commot in multiple ways as usual. É lé ton si be. The tax shall continue through the life cycle of the investment.

Ema se pupo.

Customer dada ni 🎼🕺🏻.



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