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The Naked King

 

 

emperors_new_clothes1.jpg

Once upon a time there was an Emperor who loved clothes! And he loved clothes so much that he would get changed twelve times a day.

One day, two strangers arrived at the Emperor’s palace.

“We can make you the most beautiful clothes in the world” they said.

For weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks the strangers worked on the clothes and wouldn’t let anybody see what they were doing. But the Emperor grew impatient;

“Where are the new clothes I have paid you to make,” demanded the Emperor!

“But they are right here, Your Majesty,” said the first stranger. “What do you think? Aren’t they made of the most delightful material, the most sparkling colours and the most fashionable design?”

The Emperor looked around confused; he couldn’t see anything!

“I can’t see any clothes at all,” the Emperor said.

“These,” the strangers said. “These clothes are so special and rare that only the cleverest people can see them. They are too fine to be seen by stupid and ignorant people; that is the magic of these amazing new clothes!”

“Oh of course, of course” said the Emperor quickly (not wanting to appear stupid or ignorant). “They are beautiful; this is just what I’ve always wanted! I’m sure my new clothes will be greatly admired by all of my people.

The Emperor promised to pay the strangers anything they wanted if they would have the new clothes ready for the big parade. He wanted everybody in the kingdom to see them!

The day of the big parade came and the two strangers presented the Emperor with his new clothes.

“Everyone will admire you, Your Majesty.  The new clothes look most wonderful,” said the strangers.

By this time the word had got out that these new clothes were so special that they could only be seen by clever people and, not wanting to appear stupid or ignorant, all the Emperor’s friends said…

“How beautiful!  What colours! What style! Your new clothes are magnificent, Your Majesty!”

“Oh dear,” thought the Emperor. “All my friends can see my new clothes but I can’t. Does this mean I’m stupid and ignorant and not fit to be Emperor? I will have to pretend I can see them so that nobody thinks I’m stupid. No-one can know the truth!”

When it was time for the big parade the Emperor put on his new clothes, said “Follow me” to his friends, and marched out of his palace and onto the street.

Crowds of people lined the road and watched the Emperor and the big parade. There were knights on horseback, huge elephants with jewels and smartly dressed soldiers parading along the street. But the star attraction of the big parade were the Emperor’s new clothes! The crowds had all heard that only clever people could see the Emperor’s new clothes and, not wanting to appear stupid or ignorant, they all said:

“What a lovely outfit!” “Doesn’t he look smart!” “How lovely are the Emperor’s new clothes!”

The Emperor was very pleased that everyone was admiring his new clothes, even if he couldn’t see them himself!

Suddenly, a little voice from the crowd shouted out…

“Hang on! He’s got nothing on! The Emperor’s as naked as the day he was born!”

A hushed silence fell over the crowd and the big parade stopped… Then… Everyone suddenly burst out laughing!

“The little boy’s right,” they said. “The Emperor hasn’t got any clothes on!”

The Emperor blushed and went red. They were right… He wasn’t wearing any clothes at all!”

“Pass me a cloak,” he ordered one of his friends. “I must return to the palace and put some clothes on! I should never have trusted those strangers that only wanted to flatter me and take my money!”

From that day on, the Emperor gave the little boy an important job in his palace because he was the only person that had told the truth. And, whenever the Emperor needed advice he would always ask the little boy first.

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Lesson:

Let our leaders know the truth always. This way, they will have the right information to better serve us. When we keep pretending that all is well without pointing them to the issues and ensuring they attack it with the right urgency, we mislead them and the problem lingers. An example in point is how they kept GEJ blind to the realities of the missing Chibok girls for 17 days! Never shield them from reality. If you do so, they will fail and end up in shame. Guess who suffers a failure in governance?

Ask yourself, on this new march with Buhari, are we doing the same things?

SAN

(Adapted from H. C Andersen’s “The Emperor’s New Clothes”)

http://www.worldstories.org.uk/stories/story/65-the-emperors-new-clothes

 

Image source: Jacoby & Stuart (2013).

 

 

Give Them Feedback, Even If It Hurts

In the early stages of his career, Jide had a boss who was very impressed with his performance. He gave him a lot of exposure and ensured he was involved in the major activities of the group, in spite of his relatively junior position. Jide did well at everything assignment he was given. Oga constantly got positive feedback from stakeholders about him. He was on a roll it seemed. At every annual appraisal, he would ask Oga about his performance and areas of improvement, beyond the showers of praise and bullet points of accomplishment he had written in his report. “You’re doing well. No complaints. Just keep doing what you’re doing”, he would say.

 

Each time the company announced the elevation of people to positions that he had in his future scope, he would note the qualifications, behaviours, attributes, and skills that they based the selection on and  would assess himself against these and come short on a good number of them. He came to the conclusion that he was not growing. He was just good enough for the expectations and current needs of this current job, it seemed. So he elected to vie for another job.

 

After he was selected for the new position, he went to his wonderful boss for his blessing. Sad to see me leave, Oga shut the office door and told him two areas that he thought he should look to improve on if he was to go far in “this business”. Hmmm…and he never  said anything all these years.

Why only now?

“Because I did not want to discourage you. You were doing well above your peers and I did not see the need to dampen your spirit. I felt it was better to keep encouraging you instead”, was Oga’s response.

Jide thanked him and moved on.

 

The next job was more of an interregnum and a good fork in the road. Capital project assignment, lots of travel, new people, ample family time, cultural exchange, etc. Life was good! Many lessons there too. He was an independent contributor who had scant interaction with leadership. But I’ll fast forward to the one after that. Same company, new role and back to HQ.  The boss was a straight shooter. He called Jide to his office on his first day and had a chat to welcome him. He told him that of the people interviewed, he was not necessarily the best on paper, but had a key ingredient they were looking for. However, if he was to succeed, he would need, among others, those same (two) attributes/skills that the first boss (belatedly) spoke of years ago at his exit interview. He sighed inside. He had really not learned much.

 

So he set to work. Through the performance year, his boss would constantly ask about him from the client group and give him honest direct feedback on his progress towards attaining the unit’s goals and imbibing those skills and behaviors they had spoken about when he joined. Also, Jide opened a line of communication with the client group manager on his service delivery and behavior. Honest feedback after direct feedback, with tips and directions on how to improve and more opportunities to extend him, came from these folks. His first appraisal was his very first “just average” report since he joined the company. But it contained lots of text on his contribution, and the areas needing improvement and to be focused on for the next year.  Even with his all-time worst appraisal score, he left feeling good. This looked real, unlike the powder puffed “empty praises” he had been receiving from previous Ogas. He carefully made notes of the key areas needing improvement.

After 18 months, he left that position for another one. It was a strategic placement that took him two steps up. At the debrief session with these two managers, he was shown a matrix of how he performed, his contribution to the group and client and the legacy he would be leaving behind. They told him they would have never let him go, but that he had been noticed by someone high up in management and had been poached! He almost cried. He could not believe they were speaking about him. Apparently, he had become exceptional.

 

In his next job, he was a supervisor to some up and coming employees. He used the lessons learned from these last two managers in nurturing and shaping his direct reports as much as he could. Years later, moving up with a new position and different area of focus, he would routinely come across or hear about employees who had passed through him. He could see the handwork of those two managers, who though tough, were honest with him. The ones who called him out as needed, and gave direction on how to improve. The ones who were not afraid to tell him the truth, though they liked his work. Those he supervised had benefited from what he learned from two old chaps they will probably never meet. The system worked and he was glad to be part of the chain.

 

No matter how much you like someone or appreciate their service, never fail to call them out on their failings or weak points. Use that as an opportunity to positively affect their future. There’s always an area needing improvement in everyone…even champions.

 

Those that watch you go astray just to be seen as “in your corner” are not helping you. Feedback should be specific, relevant and timely while the expected outcomes from follow up should be understood, measurable and attainable.

You think you’re good? Maybe the best? You can be even better.

SAN

#112 for Lagos Emergencies

 LASG ambulance
Not too long ago, my buddy Tolu and I were cruising down the Cameroon highway going southwards and noticed a small crowd and some go-slow on the other side of the road. Someone had been knocked down, it seemed. I slowed down a bit to gawk like the others and once we established what it was, I immediately called the emergency services on 112 and a lady answered the very first time.
“Hello, this is the LASG emergency services, how can we help you?”
“Sir, confirm Lekki-Epe expressway by Swiisstrade/Doby’s heaven on the side going to Lekki?”
“Your name and current location sir. OK. Our people are on their way, thank you”.
So we stopped at Tolu’s neighbourhood for an hour or so before I headed further south for home. I made a pit stop at the neigbourhood foamy liquid spot and checked my phone for messages, etc. It turns out that an artisan who was doing some work for me at my home and was supposed to be going to Agungi to get some supplies before returning to finish the work, had tried calling me and then sent a text to tell me he would not be returning due to some traffic he encountered. I called him to ask about the progress of the work. In the course of our discussion he told me the traffic was caused by an ambulance picking up an injured person near Swisstrade. I checked the time of his call and text and it was about 22 mins from the time I placed that call to emergency services. Going by the fact that the call itself took about 2-3 mins and the ambulance would have had to wade through traffic and then U-turn at VGC roundabout, if coming from Lekki side, it was a reasonable response time.
I did not even have to call Tolu to give him this feedback. I have seen the ambulance attending to people from time to time, since Fashola years till date, for this not to be a big deal.
But there is also the memory of a very bad emergency response incident on third mainland bridge a few months ago, which I hope they have learnt from and the logistics nightmare of having a  burgeoning population in a sprawling metropolis full of “sometimes” heavy traffic and barely motor-able inner city roads. But it can only get better.
Have you had the need to call the LASG emergency services? What has been your experience. Also, tell us how they can improve.
SAN

Words on marble from Ifeanyi Ubah’s letter to Nigerians

I woke up this morning and my friend, Aijay the Cyberagbero, pointed me to this gem of a letter from Dr. Ifeanyi Ubah, titled “Hour of Truth – Dr. Ifeanyi Ubah’s Economic/Financial Intervention (N200 per Dollar) – Volume I”.

As is my wont, I tend to forgo the substance for more important matters of “serious national importance” like these gems of quotable quotes from the long treatise.

I have numbered them serially just for reference. Let us know which one is your best quote in the comments section.

Enjoy.

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1. “I have always volunteered in the past, to intervene in issues of this magnitude without proper consultation, acknowledgement or appreciation from the relevant authorities. I seek a change from the norm. It would do no one any harm if the relevant authorities showed a little bit of gratitude for my timely interventions as it concerns matters of national interest. “
 
2. “I must quickly add, “Ifeanyi Ubah” remains a man perceived as controversial and is often misunderstood. This is because of the will and strong desire to stay with and protect the interest of masses according to divine injunctions contrary to the exploitative wish and machinations of political and economic elite. This erroneous perception is the steep price I have to pay for being an incorruptible Nigerian and clear mirror to the nefarious elite who often collude to hatch, over the years, series of unfounded allegations leveled against me and circulated using the media but to the glory of God, none has been either proven or substantiated.”
 
3. “My belief and faith in GOD has made me to understand that “the poor we will always have with us” but we need to understand and practice what the Bible expects of us in Deuteronomy 15: 11, which says, “Therefore I command you to be openhanded toward your fellow Israelites (Nigerians) who are poor and needy in your land”. This is why it is not philanthropy or corporate social responsibility when I pursue pro-poor agenda. For example, to the glory of God, I singlehandedly built the best street in Lagos and continue to give uninterrupted power supply to my entire neighborhood in Lagos, a responsibility I took up and have been fulfilling for a decade now. I have never spoken about this before and I am thankful to my neighbors for their prayers that is the most I need from them.”
 
4. ” Since my TV appearance and statement on Sunday night on Channels TV, the Dollar crashed from about N400/$1 to a year-low of N220/$1 before stabilizing at N290-N300/$1 currently. Is this not enough evidence that we can arrest this artificial freefall of the Naira with honesty and ingenuity?
 
Our media appearances constitute another component that will galvanize and mobilize Nigerians for proactive measures, which include shunning, ignoring and rejecting the Dollar until it crashes to N200! We are calling upon Nigerians to demystify our demand for this commodity – THE DOLLAR – and stop patronizing products that drain Nigerian forex reserves. You can now observe that this is not a POLITICAL STUNT, as some quarters would want well-meaning Nigerians to believe.”
 
5. “I sincerely feel the pains of the ordinary Nigerian concerning the freefall of the value of Naira. I have prayed and consulted my God, who has led me to offer the solution, to help in any way I can and to tell all I know. I decided to stake the entirety of my asset to my assertion, in order to save the common Nigerian, many of which suffer the ripple effect of the slide in the value of Naira, a slide that has been inexplicably detrimental to the livelihood of Nigerians by way of inflation.”
 
6. ” My loyalty rests with those traders who cannot import anymore because of this outrageous hike in the exchange rate. My concern lies with those parents who cannot afford to pay the school fees of their children studying abroad or the sick, who on health grounds travel abroad, but find the prices to be paid for treatment too steep as a result of the exchange rate. I am worried for those ICT professionals who need software from foreign countries but have to pay double as a result of the freefall of the Naira.”
 
7. “It may also interest Nigerians to know that my team and I have also been working tirelessly on a number of issues aimed at fostering the growth and development of Nigeria and her economy. We have designed 2 templates/systems on how Nigeria’s IGR (Internally Generated Revenue) can be grown by 30% – GUARANTEED. However, we have decided to push our concepts and strategies out in phases. This will come in the next phase of our intervention scheme.
 
I leave this in the hands of Nigerians and for posterity to judge.
 
God bless the Federal Republic of Nigeria.”
 
Dr. Ifeanyi Patrick Ubah
Abuja, Nigeria
Sunday, February 28, 2016
You can find the full text of the communication here  on his Facebook page.
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SAN

On what Change is…

Change must be holistic and systemic; with its result being the pulling down of paradigms and establishment of new ways that enable the corporate vision to be achieved in a sustainable manner. Change must be endearing and capable of building institutions that not only replicate themselves across diverse spheres of the polity and endeavour , but grow and improve continually through different situations and times whilst gathering champions from among the citizens in its wake.

So before speaking of change, leaders have to see and communicate a vision, assemble a competent team of believers who can chart strategies and execute tactical plans towards achieving this vision and be the face of this change as champions displaying exemplary conduct.

Also, the citizens must see what’s in it for them, buy into and sustain the vision through their own day to day actions.

This is when change is complete.

SAN

The Vatican, Donald Trump and Walls

The Pope recently was quoted as saying anyone who builds walls to separate families and people is not a Christian as this was not what Christ preached, etc.

Donald Trump responded by saying it was disgraceful for the The Pope to be questioning his faith. 

The US Catholic spokesman also clarified the Pope’s comment and responded to questions around the poser raised on the Vatican’s own walls with the comment below:

“The walls at the Vatican were built in the 1800s to keep out Barbarians from the city”.

Compare this with Trump’s statement on building a wall: 

“I would build a wall around the US borders to keep out murderers, drug dealers and rapists from coming to the US”.

What’s the difference?

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Watch video from CNN here:

http://edition.cnn.com/2016/02/18/politics/pope-francis-trump-christian-wall/index.html

SAN

Between Faith and Medicine – Citizen Mercy’s Story

In the course of interviewing and screening several candidates for the position of domestic helper in my home, we requested medical test results for some basic communicable medical conditions from the candidates. These tests are usually carried out at a reputable private hospital not far from our home.

One candidate came back with a test result that had hepatitis B as positive. As is routine, we approached the doctor, with the candidate, for a proper interpretation of the results. We were told her sample showed a strong strain of hepatitis B that was active and easily communicable. On interviewing the young lady further she told us she had been suffering some of the symptoms for some time now. This was further confirmed by the doctor after a brief examination. He told us about her discoloured skin, etc.

We decided we could not hire her as a domestic helper in this present condition, as working in the kitchen and sharing utensils, etc., might expose our household to this illness. We communicated our decision, counselled her and gave her enough money to visit the general hospital in her neighbourhood, carry out a repeat test, commence treatment, buy drugs and get by for a while.

Visibly disappointed, she thanked us and left for home. She sent my wife the text message, in the screenshot below, a day later.

 

Msg 1

 

Msg 2

The summary of it is that she thanked us for the money and kindness and also rejected the notion that she was ill. By faith, He that is in her is greater than whatever sickness the devil has thrown her way. Well, true.

However, we sensed some form of denial  and decided to call her. We observed she was still adamant on her stand that the test results (and even symptoms) did not really prove she was ill, ascribing it to the enemy trying to prevent her from getting a job and things along those lines.
We managed to counsel her by giving several examples and that even pastors still went to hospitals for check ups, treatment, surgeries and other medical interventions.  We told her it was not necessarily a judgement on her faith and that the Christian faith recognizes the position of physicians in the society, etc. In the end, she agreed to visit the local general hospital for another test and consultation, etc. On a subsequent call she confirmed she had commenced consultations at the general hospital in. We shall be calling her later to get an update.

SAN


Epilogue – February 25, 2016 

It’s now been about three weeks since our encounter with “Mercy” (the meaning of her name in English). We hired one of the candidates from the pack about a week ago. We tried calling Mercy without any success. Yesterday, my wife enquired about her well being from the lady who referred her. She said she believed that the prophetess at Mercy’s Church told her to disregard the medical tests as false witness from the devil. She has since been hired by a local eatery.

Be rest assured that I’ll follow up on the location and engage in the best interest of Mercy and the public and within the bounds of empathy and ethical consideration. I’ll do an update post on it in future. .

But, what laws/regulations do we have in place for public or municipal health and how are they enforced? Also, If a private citizen can carry out this basic rigour as a pre-requisite for employing domestic help, how come some public eateries don’t do same? What if she’s actually working for a mama-put? Do these ones even fall under these regulations, or are our civil servants more interested in inspecting the shiny restaurants and eateries? As a citizen, can you ask to see the health certificates of the staff of the next place you go to eat? Do you even know your local government public health office? What is your role?

Budget Debacle: where are the perm secs?

  
Truth be told, the “I am (not) a criminal” saga was a welcome distraction for many Buharists and informal presidential mouthpieces. It trended just as another piece of news snuck into the stands and disappeared in a hale of English comprehension lessons and different versions of that (London) Telegraph interview.

Lucky folks. For how would they have come back from their initial defense of the budget to Buhari now sacking all those senior civil servants for bungling the budget and padding it with a record N1.7T in pork chops or is it yams now? Same budget that “we did not understand” as we are not trained economists but empty vessel armchair critics? Same one that zero budgeting would have taken care of? Same one that had a multi billion Naira state house hospital capital expenditure that was ok, as it would stop medical tourism by the state house residents? Same budget that the health minister has now denied as not being his???

The most interesting part for me was our conversations before ministers were appointed. You know…when all those nice pictures of Mr.P breaking bread at Ramadan, with all those perm secs at the villa, was shared with glee across our online space. 

The refrain then was: 

“what do ministers do sef?”

“Perm secs do all the work”

“Ministers only drive convoys and blow sirens”

“Yes, they are noisemakers!”

“Buhari can run the government without ministers”

“Perm secs are responsible for the budget…they write it after all”

On the note of who is responsible for the budget, they did not care about our argument of responsible Vs accountable and task doer Vs task owner. They also turned a deaf ear when we told them how same perm secs must have been part of the rot of the Jonathan years, as signatories to release of illicit funds, etc. So now, how many perm secs did you call out for the budget scandal? Do you even know the name of the perm secs for any of Fashola’s or Fayemi’s ministries? Yet you went to town on these two ministers and their billion naira pork chopped official residence and bogus N800m website line items? Not perm Sec anymore?

Anyhow, you did the right thing. Fashola is accountable and even responsible and Mr. P is ultimately responsible and owns the outcomes, good or bad.

And perm secs? Well, on behalf of the ministers, they run and administer the  bureaucratic apparatus and structure that carries out actions ranging from strategy to planning and execution, in the delivery of the ends of governance. 

Opinions that will enrich my learning are welcome.

SAN

Today Was a Good Day

The following describes a day in the life of some opposition bloggers and how they respond to  news.

“Nigerian troops kill Boko Haram fighters”

  • You frown. It can’t be true. They must be Cameroonian or Chadian troops. You zoom your screen and scrutinize their uniforms and tags…go check more weblinks. Off to EgbereTV for counter information…none found. You are sad. You find an old one on a bomb and you quickly share it. Nonsense! How can the army be winning? Mschew!

“NNPC Warri and Kaduna refineries closed. Escravos crude oil and gas pipelines blown by militants”.

  • Yes!!! Good news! Serves them right. I told you they could not govern successfully. They can’t even guard our pipelines! Just before you share the story, NEPA takes light and darkness distracts you. You go and pour your last four litres of petrol and start your gen to continue your gleeful sharing of the news. It did not occur to you that the gas turbine in the power plant serving you had to be shut down due to that pipeline sabotage…that was why your power was cut.

“New York Times says Buhari government monetary policy is un-effective and will damage the economy”.

  • More smiles. Quickly share the news story. Tweet it and go round all your friend’s pages making comments about how clueless the president is. Yet you do not bother to read the news report to understand the specific parts of the policy they have an issue with and use your advantage of local knowledge to judge to see if they are right or if their conclusion is one borne of our interest or of that of the foreign bodies they are affiliated to, etc.

“Iran warns Buhari about his treatment of Shia Muslims”.

  • See them. Iran is warning them now. If they like they should not behave themselves. When we told them the COAS should have turned back and come to pass another day, they did not listen. In fact I pray that Iran attacks us so they learn a lesson. Share the news one time. It does not matter to you that a warning from Iran on our internal matter, purely motivated by their affiliation to a religious movement, is an insult to our (collective) national psyche and sovereignty.

Aaah…you are tired. You plug your phone to charge. That was enough good news for one day. You got to post four big ones. You were right after all. This government is not working. Your gen runs out of petrol and stutters to silence. More darkness. Heat. Sweat starts. You swat a mosquito. You still manage to sleep…because you are happy. This country is not working under Buhari. You shall wake up to more tales of woe from EgbereTV, TrentOnline, Scannews, TheHerald_dotcom and the walls of your favourite Facebook grand cyclops and instigators…this thought comforts you as you snooze off.

 

SAN

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